I’ve been told before that after birth there would be days when I would feel “blah”, I just didn’t think there would be so many. My amazing little boy has been on a feeding frenzy, so there is very little time spent outside of our home. The lack of sleep and natural vitamin D, followed by poor diet and no exercise has had me feeling the blues. I am still awaiting approval to return to my usual workout routines and I am actually fiending to surf again. I seriously crave the sun and ocean, and without these two elements, I really struggle. I have also been very emotional lately and missing my mother who passed away in April. Every time I look at baby Q, I remember how happy my mother was when she found out I was pregnant. She would’ve eaten him up and loved to tell me how to raise him, lol. It’s been challenging to fight off the darkness, but I have a choice. I have the choice to feel the darkness and soak it in, allowing it to have a lasting effect. Or, I have the choice to feel the darkness and get off my ass to move past it. I choose the latter.
I started by acknowledging that I fell off the wagon and have been eating like shit, enjoying the things I couldn’t have with gestational diabetes and not discriminating against anything quick and tasty. But recently I have started eating much healthier meals again and am finding that it has a huge impact on how I feel each day. Last week I was given the okay by my healthcare provider to take 30 min walks. That’s fine, but it isn’t doing the job for my feel goods. Yesterday I made it a point to get up early and go to the gym. Without going overboard, I pushed myself to get past the excuses and it was so worth it. I did a mile on the treadmill and lifted light weights to awaken my arms. As for the emotions involving my mother… I have accepted that I will feel sadness and that I will miss her, but I have so many memories of her that I can share with my son. Just thinking about her crazy personality makes me smile.
I share this with you knowing that I can’t be the only new mom out there feeling this way. I also share this with you in case you are going to be a mommy and to let you know that if you face these blah days, not to worry because there are better days ahead. As new mothers we will be entering a whole new stage of life and our shit gets seriously disrupted, hormones and all! Besides my generously supportive husband and the most ridiculously awesome child of mine, I have found that taking care of ME makes me happiest and allows me to be a better person, wife, and mother. It is difficult to allow myself the time and pampering that I deserve, but it is essential that we continue the things we enjoy, get out for fresh air, and take care of ourselves to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I believe this so much that I have set up a month of pampering, haha! Each week this month I am treating myself to a self-loving treat, starting with a massage and ending with a day of shopping!
All joking aside, not all of us are fortunate enough to dodge the onset of depression, and postpartum depression is such a real thing. It’s important to know the signs and when it’s time to seek help. A healthy Mom equals a healthy baby, is what I frequently remind myself. It really helps me through many of my challenges. What is it that you do to stay happy? Please share your experiences and thoughts by leaving comments. I truly love hearing from you.